Tuesday, August 23, 2011

A new day

Yes, my post from yesterday was a little dramatic and sad...but I blame the glass of red wine I had at dinner with some girlfriends last night and the fact that this Saturday is the one year anniversary of my miscarriage and d&c.  I can't believe it's been a year already...but more than that I cannot believe that I'm still not pregnant (well I might be, but I'm still waiting for implantation.)  I really thought that I would be pregnant again already and we are doing everything right and yet each month AF comes and its getting harder and harder. 

However, today is a new day and I'm going to focus on the positives and some recent happy events,  I'm gonna go with bullet points because there is a lot to catch up on.

1.  We had a great vacation in Hilton Head.  The weather was perfect and it was so relaxing  It was the week before ovulation and I ovulated on the Saturday that we were driving home, so I'm hoping the relaxing from vacation is what did it for us this time around.  It was so nice to have a week off from work and to get to sleep in past 5:30 (and not set an alarm!!).  I got along really well with my family too.  (My pregnant twin sister was not there...which is why I was able to relax and we didn't really even talk about her.)

2.  CJ and I celebrated our 3rd Wedding Anniversary on last week.  I can't believe it has been 3 years.  He is without a doubt my best friend, true companion, and soul mate.  He wrote the sweetest thing on a card that he gave me.  I'm paraphrasing but he basically said that this is what he always dreamed marriage would be like and he's glad that he married his best friend (me!!).  He is the best man and the perfect man for me.  To celebrate we went out to dinner and then got some ice cream for dessert, but we were so full that we just saved the ice cream for another day.  It was nice to have a date night and then come home to our wonderful puppy! Here's to many more wonderful years!!

3.  We went camping this past weekend with our puppy and some friends.  It was nice to get away again and it was just a really relaxing weekend with lots of reading and hiking and board games. 

4.  I won my first ever giveaway.  Thanks to Diana at http://bunlessintheoven.blogspot.com/.  If you havent been to over to her blog yet, you should totally check it out.  It's awesome and she is so positive.  I'm hoping that my winning the giveaway is a sign of good things to come...fingers crossed.  (See I told you I was being more positive today.)

5.  I made some extra money moonlighting at work tonight, which is great because I have to be here anyways and it's nice to have a little bit of money going into a IUI cycle. 

6.  I moving to a new fertility clinic and hopefully, we'll be going forward with IUI this month.  I'm hoping to try something else besides Clomid because even though it's getting me to ovulate, it's just not getting me knocked up. I'm really excited for IUI.  It looks like the cycle with cost about $1000, but it will depend on which meds I'm on and how many ultrasounds I need.  I will need a minimum of 2 ultrasounds (cd3 and cd12) and then we'll see.  The IUI is roughly $400.  I have my first appointment over there next Thursday.  Depending on how this cycle finishes that may be later than cd3 so then they told me to just give them a call and they'll bring me in on cd3.  The woman on the phone was so nice and helpful and was actually able to answer all my questions about how the cycle will work and how much it will cost.  (As you know though, I'm hoping an IUI won't be needed and that I'm baking one or more little ones as we speak.) 

7.  I decided not to test again.  Last night was just a slip brought on my over-thinking and red wine.  By the light of day though I think I will be better off just waiting for AF to show next Monday or Tuesday.  If she's a no show that I'll test either Monday or Tuesday.  I had an interesting horoscope for this month with a mention of possible pregnany with the new moon on the 28th, so we'll see what the new moon brings.  Plus, I ovulated on a full moon!!  That should count for something. 

Alright, well I got have to get back to work!!  Have a great night!!


  1. Happy Anniversary!! Sounds like a great week and hooray for positives :)

  2. Happy anniversary sweet pea!!! Wishing u and CJ many many many more years!
    I'm so happy for ur positivity! I know it's hard though. And it's ok to gave breakdowns. I have them all the time! Believe me. I'm crossing my fingers that AF doesn't show her ugly face on Mon for u. That'd pretty cool what ur horoscope said! Yay! This is ur time! It's going to happen. Just keep faith and believe hard!!! We're closer than we think ;)

    Thanks for mentioning me :) and I hope u enjoy ur book!

    Big hugs to u... Good night and sleep well. Drift away to happy thoughts :)