Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Bring out the checkbook...

After 2 days of cramping, I started spotting today and I'm sure AF will make her appearance momentarily.  I'm pretty bummed.  The cramps were helpful because I knew she was coming so I didn't get my hopes up, but I was hoping for a Christmas miracle of our own.  A miracle that would bring us a baby in 9 months, save us more than $20K, bring us so much hope and happiness going into the New Year, and so much more.  I'm trying to pray more and one phrase that has been on repeat in my head is 'not my plan, but yours (God's)' and I am trying to sit back and let God's plan happen, but I was kinda hoping his plan was for us to get pregnant on our own on the eve of starting IVF.  It just wasn't meant to be.

Now, I'm trying to get excited about IVF, but I need some time to get over yet another BFN and another arrival of AF. 

Note:  AF arrived the exact same time last year, 2 days after Christmas.  I really hate her!! 


  1. I'm so sorry this cycle was a BFN. :-(

    And I like your prayer about it being God's plan. That's a really good thought to remember.

  2. Sorry to hear this, but I really hope IVF works out for you!

  3. Sorry you didn't get a Christmas miracle and that AF made her grand appearance. Will you be starting ivf soon? I started birth control pills yesterday so we may be close in timing. Wishing you the best with your upcoming cycle.

  4. Argh! I'm sorry AF showed. I, too, was hoping for our own Christmas miracle, but it just doesn't seem that it will happen. AF was supposed to be here the 24, but she didn't. We're not one the last part of the 27 and I feel nothing. :( I have taken two tests and both were BFN! Idk what's going on with my body (Ever since being on Provera, I'm always starting on the exact day!), but whatever is going on...it's killing me. We're going to start the process for IVF after the New Year, so maybe I'll be pregnant soon after you!

    I'm right there with you about the praying thing. I should pray more, really, but I just feel...prayed out?!?! Maybe that sounds crazy, but I've prayed for this baby (that I've yet to receive) since I was a little girl. Surly God has heard my prayer at least once, right?

  5. I hate her too. But I am so hopeful and excited for your upcoming IVF :)

  6. I'm so sorry you didn't get a Christmas miracle BFP. I too am hoping for a BFP right before IVF. That said, I won't be shocked if it doesn't happen. I'm unlucky!
    I wish you all the best with your upcoming IVF. I will keep my fingers firmly crossed that it only takes one try.